last post!

 What's your relationship with procrastination?😱😱😱

Unless you’re a superhuman, procrastination is something that you’ve had to deal with. That feeling of staring at the screen and creating excuses to put it off for another day as dread looms over you. Can I pull off another miracle? While others might view procrastination as beneficial to their life, for me, it has always been a painful source of uneasiness that I’m willing to do anything to get rid of. Except actually do the work of course, that’s too much to ask for.

Weirdly enough, I never procrastinated through middle school and it was uni that really brought out the hidden demon that I seemingly can’t shake off. Throughout online school, zoom classes and asynchronous classes (my beloved) only seemed to magnify my tendency to procrastinate. The abundance of freedom and lack of immediate consequences, when it came to assignments and sometimes even attendance, allowed me to act on my impulsive desires. This is one of the reasons why I think in-person school is necessary because it can create boundaries between work and break. Why would I want to study if I could just watch youtube and play games? Mustering up that self-control is nearly impossible because it’s just a click away. It was pretty evident after online school that I needed to change something.

As much as I hate procrastination, I recognize that I got lucky. Talking with others, I learned that some people don’t have that sense of dread creeping up, allowing them to procrastinate to their heart's desire. My procrastination is an unpleasant signal, almost like pain, to get me rolling. While I sometimes envy others that can go about their day without that sense of impending unease, I recognize that it’s a weird motivator. I’ve almost come to appreciate our strange relationship. It’s like a personal alarm system, constantly blaring to ensure I don’t stray too far. Through each of my struggles, I realized that there is no quick fix. The journey to fixing this is a step-by-step process where each experience builds upon your understanding of procrastination. Understanding that motivation isn’t always there, but adopting a schedule and sticking to it is the most important. 

I’m not some sage who knows all the answers, but I’d say that my procrastination has mellowed down and I’ve kept some sayings that have helped me. Go ahead and postpone tasks if they disappear, but embrace those you can’t avoid, my father’s motto. Of course, it’s easier said than done, but it makes sense. Why postpone if all it does is add to the difficulty? Postponing only shrinks the amount of time available to address inevitable tasks. While the temptation is always there lurking, true happiness lies not in delaying for now but in facing the challenge head-on and conquering it. The path of productivity begins with the courage to take that first step. Every time you study, you study less! I know, embarrassingly obvious, but I’ve realized that weaponizing my disdain for that activity can somehow motivate me. I thought about it this way, if I really hate this task, I’d hate to do this when I feel even worse. It’s definitely an unorthodox idea, but whatever helps to study is a win.